- 70 AD: the fall and desecration of Jerusalem ended the world, according to the Preterists. Whoops.
- 500: Hippolytus of Rime worked out the Biblical ’6,000 year rule’ to apply to this year. For more fun with that same figure, keep reading.
- 989: Halley’s Comet always brings impending doom. Just ask Mark Twain.
- 1000: very little of an apocalyptic nature happened this year, aside from a bunch of Christians getting worked up about the rather flexible millennium date.
- 1874: the Jehovah’s Witnesses begin a long and lucrative career of predicting Armageddon, starting with this year. BTW: it didn’t happen.
- 1878: It didn’t happen this year, either.
- 1881: no, really…the JW’s were on a roll.
- 1910: again? Well, if you Witnesses say so.
- 1914: people are probably starting to wonder about Jehovah’s Witnesses.
- 1918: we like the four-year cycle, but could the Jehovah’s Witnesses maybe split it up into a summer apocalypse and a winter apocalypse?
- 1925: about this time, people may be forgiven for hoping that the world ends just to shut the Jehovah’s Witnesses up about it.
- 1975: they gave us a 50-year break (which included WWII, which was chock full of apocalyptic signs) but those scrappy Jehovah’s Witnesses aren’t done yet.
- 1982: “The Christ is Now Here”, according to the Tara Center, who later state that He’s not ready to reveal himself after all.
- 1984: Orwell buffs and Jehovah’s Witnesses alike considered this to be a significant year. Unless Van Halen is the antichrist (not unproven), they were probably all wrong.
- 1994: Nostradamus tries posthumously to beat the Jehovah’s Witnesses record for most failed predictions. Luckily, he’s much more vague and obscure, so he’s never really wrong…
- 1997: No, really, the Christ is Now Here, according to Share International (a.k.a. the Tara Center). Interestingly enough, The Christ (a.k.a. Maitreya) tops the list of several groups who believe him to be the Antichrist instead. Either way is okay with us — we still get apocalypse!
- 1998: This is the year, says Nostradamus and others (and maybe not even him). For example, Eli Eshoh proved that the Rapture was going to happen, and by golly, it did (didn’t you notice?). We’re still not sure who were raptured, but those of us Left Behind should watch out for 2028. Two ends of the world for the price of one? Good deal!
- 2000: the change of the millennium makes a great date for the End Times. However, even the Y2K Bug turned out to be little more than a minor inconvenience.
- 2003: Ah, those wacky Zetas. They seemed so sure, and now Nancy and the rest of the earthworm-eaters simply claim that the Pole Shift of May 15th, 2003 was some sort of smokescreen or conspiracy, and the real day is still coming. But they won’t say when.
- 2008 2009 2010 2011: The Lord’s Witnesses (absolutely NOT Jehovah’s Witnesses, despite strikingly obvious similarities) are pretty sure that it’s all over one of these years. Well, as long as there’s still a World War I veteran alive, we’ve got nothing to worry about…so at least a year or two. Additionally, Harold Camping of Family Radio is pretty sure it’s all over in May. Or maybe October. Either way, he’s 100% sure.
- 2012: a very popular choice lately (and will probably remain so, up until the end of December). The basis for this date is Mayan calendars, Nostradamus, and sunspot predictions — and possibly a savvy marketing campaign by the Cults and Survival Gear coalition.
- 2014: Hey, this one comes from a Pope, so it must be true. In 1514 Leo IX gave us 500 years. You’d think that would be long enough to get our act together, but noooooooo…
- 2017: and then there’s the “Sword of God Brotherhood” (great name) who will be the only ones surviving this year, tasked with repopulating the planet. Hopefully there’s a Sisterhood as well. Or not…
- 2028: Eli Eshoe again. Anybody left after the great Rapture of 2008 (remember that?) and the ensuing tribulation (i.e., now) has until 2028 to prove themselves. Get to work.
- 2240: the Talmud says that the world as we know it will only last 6,000 years, starting with the creation of Adam (which apparently happened about 5770 years ago…sorry, Lucy). The Talmud is pretty discouraging about how much fun our final two centuries are going to be, but the world after Armageddon should be very nice.
- 2280: the Qur’an gives us 40 more years than the Talmud, according to Dr. Rashad Khalifa and a computer-assisted numerical analysis of the holy text.
- 3797: this one comes from Nostradamus, but so have quite a few other dates (past and future). Just in case this was the year that he really meant, clear your schedule.
Tag Archives: odd
Bad Parenting
Mexicans in pointy boots
Unless you spend even more time on the internet and you’re more aware of Mexican fashion trends than I am (note: DOUBTFUL), you probably haven’t heard of the Mexican pointy cowboy boots trend. But rest assured that it is a real fashion trend, and those guys in the above picture aren’t attempting to achieve some ironic meme fame. Their confident demeanor is an earnest expression of the knowledge that in their culture, they look really f*cking cool. But what the I don’t even… Luckily Vice has put together a short documentary (nine minutes) you can watch at lunch or on a break or while you’re supposed to be working today, which will explain everything you ever wanted to know about Mexicans wearing pointy cowboy boots. Okay, maybe not everything, but the most concise explanation seems to be this:
“Tribal music brought the pointy boots. In the beginning, people were wearing regular boots. Then people started making them pointier and pointier, until it got out of control.”
Remember that old Chappelle show sketch about how the crips/bloods gang war started because someone stepped on someone else’s sneaker? Maybe these boots are the reason Mexico is such a powder keg.
You’d think there’d be a better explanation, but most of the time, “because someone decided it looked cool” is all you get. It gives me the Billy Madison-esque hope that someday, peeing your pants will be the coolest (hopefully just as I reach old age). Mexicans wear pointy boots for the same reason proboscis monkeys have huge noses: it serves no functional purpose, but everyone agrees it’s totally sweet looking.
Though I understand there is a functional reason Mexicans wear baseball caps with the brims flipped up. They use it to hold their tacos while they pee.
Millions of dead fish at King Harbor in Redondo Beach
Authorities in Redondo Beach are investigating what killed millions of fish over the last day at King Harbor Marina.
Fish, including anchovies, sardines and mackerel were floating lifeless in Basins 1 and 2 of the north side of King Harbor Marina.
“There’s basically fish everywhere you go in the harbor,” said the harbor’s assistant manager, Jason McMullin, who added that there were reports that a red tide may have driven the fish into the harbor in massive numbers where they died because of limited oxygen.
Redondo Beach public works officials were dispatched to the harbor to investigate further but did not have immediate comment.
The fish were attracting huge flocks of seagulls and other birds.
[Updated at 12:15 p.m.: Redondo Beach officials said initial assessments suggest oxygen depletion in the King Harbor basins caused the massive fish die-off.
City Manager Bill Workman said city officials with the help of marine experts would help determine if there was any environmental issue involved. Tests are now being performed on the water as officials begin removing the dead fish, which city officials estimated to be in the millions.
“There are no visible signs of any toxins that might have caused [the die-off] and our early assessment is that this was oxygen depletion,” Workman said. “This is similar to what we experienced five years ago but that was distinctly a red tide event but there’s no discoloration of the water, no associated foaming in the waves, Workman said. “There are no oil slicks or leaking of substances into the water.”
Workman noted that the harbor had been teeming in recent weeks with bait fish that even after their deaths “had no signs of degradation.”]
John Wade Agan,Unluckiest Man Or Luckiest Man Alive? TAMPA ,FL
Four years ago, John Wade Agan told deputies he was robbed at gunpoint in his taxicab, roughed up and stuffed into the trunk of the car.
Three years ago, he drove to a fire station with a butcher knife sticking out of his chest.
Two years ago, in a news conference from his hospital bed, he told the world he’d been bitten by two different snakes at the same time, a claim experts doubted.
He told Said he might have been the unluckiest man in the world.
Now, Agan occupies another hospital bed, befallen, he said, by yet another freak calamity: lightning.
He said it happened Tuesday evening during the severe storm that hit the area. He was leaning over a metal kitchen sink, holding a corded phone up to his ear, when he heard a loud boom. He said he blacked out.
His 26-year-old daughter, Misty Agan, was standing just feet away from him and said she heard the phone drop. “Oh! Oh! Oh!” she said she heard her dad say before he crumpled to the ground and began to shake.
Agan said he awoke surrounded by paramedics, finding his right shoe off and a big hole in his sock. “It felt like it was on fire,” he said.
He was propped up in a bed at Tampa General Hospital,While being interviewed by a local newspaper, picking at a chef salad.
He knows what people say about him — what they said after reading about his snakebites, what some will say when they read this story — that he’s lying or somehow hurting himself, maybe to get pain medicine.
“I don’t care what people say,” Agan said. “Any day of the week, I’ll go take a drug test.”
But not today, he said. Today, he was on pain medications.
There’s no way to prove someone has or hasn’t been struck by lightning, experts say. John Agan doesn’t have any obvious burn marks. Most victims don’t.
He was sore, he said. He had a ringing in his ear. According to a hospital spokesman, his condition was good.
Two lightning experts said a strike while using a corded phone didn’t sound unusual.
“It’s certainly possible,” said Dr. Mary Ann Cooper, a widely cited expert in the narrow field of lightning injury research.
Agan, who plans to seek county aid as an indigent to pay his medical bills, said he didn’t want to be in the hospital.
A nurse checked on him.
“I’m having some discomfort again,” he told her.
“I’ll see when you can have something,” she said. “You want the oxycodone?”
“The last one you gave me,” he said. “I feel like I’ve been hit by a car.”
A reporter asked: Had that happened to him, too?
His response: “Don’t go there.”
90 Teen Pregnancies at One US High School.
Frayser High School in Tennessee USA has 90 teen girls pregnancies.The large number of student pregnancies at the High School has led to a teen pregnancy rate of 26% in the city of Frayser itself. This means that 26% of all babies born in Frayser have a teenage mother. The average national teen pregnancy rate is 10%.The high pregnancy rate has prompted a non-profit group called Girls, Inc. to launch a new campaign called “No Baby!” The program will help female teenagers obtain the knowledge and resources needed to prevent unplanned pregnancies. Deborah Hester Harrison, a spokesperson with Girl’s Inc., said the new program will also provide young teens with the willpower to just say “no” to having sex. Girl’s Inc. also provides support to help new moms cope with unexpected life changes.
Traveler Arrested For Pooping himself On Delta Flight .
—>Is there a worse place to have sudden diarrhea than on an airplane? Well, yes, and that would be on a water slide, but let’s stay with the airplane for a bit. Joao Correa was on a Delta Airlines flight from Honduras to Atlanta last week when something bad happened down below, and he had to immediately use the bathroom. Unfortunately, there was a drink cart blocking his way and the flight attendants wouldn’t let him by.
What’s worse, TSA regulations Delta won’t allow you to use the bathroom in a different section of the plane, so Correa was forbidden from going to the business class bathroom.
“When the cart wasn’t moved after a few minutes, Correa said, he ran for the business class lavatory. He said the flight attendant put up her arm to block him, and he grabbed it to keep his balance.
A Delta flight attendant said Correa grabbed her right arm, pulled it down and twisted it, according to authorities.
”
When the plane landed, Correa was arrested and spent two days in jail.
We’re not sure what alternative Delta and the TSA left Correa. Had he followed their instructions, Delta would have had an entire flight full of angry, complaining, and sickened passengers, along with quite likely a lawsuit from the man they forced to shit himself because they were too busy passing out drinks. Instead, Delta loses nothing, the TSA continues to say this is in everyone’s best interest, and Joao Correa is charged with a felony because he had diarrhea on an airplane.
Something
North Korea – Hell March – New Footage 720P
Mountain Goats are unbelievable
Are you brave enough to climb a wall like that?
Below is another example of an impossible climb by a mountain goat.
The question is – how does the goat get up there and how do they get down! If anyone has a video, please let me know in the comments!
Domesticfix 